Stare Me.

I had never seen that before. Two eyes, daring, audacious eyes, staring me back from my monitor. I didn’t know what it was? I thought it might be the consequence of yesterday’s insomniac bouts. I thought it might me an illusion; a thought or a fluke. But those eyes were seductive. They held me; scared me! I couldn’t resist looking deep into those eyes. They didn’t pursue a casual blink or a notorious wink. They leered my sanity with a gleam of a casual smirk; stripping me away from consciousness; engulfing me more and more into a nothing.

I had to do something; something to fetch myself out of this. I can’t allow these eyes to capture me; withhold me. I will myself try a blink; no maybe just mocking wink; still better, a scornful stare; or wait a minute. Are they real eyes? Am I sane? In my monitor somebody is staring me back! No way, it never happened before. But, hang on, hey those eyes smiled. Those mirthless brutal eyes smiled. No it’s not a charming smile; it’s a mean-sly-i-know-all smile. I want to get out of this. This can’t be real. I am a sane man within my senses. I had some sleep and some food; doing a real job and earning a living. I can’t afford such quixotic thoughts. They are not real. They are thoughts; those few random neurons gone awry of their path. Nothing else!

I look around. I breathe air. I drink water- preparing myself with next round. This time I will dig this mystery. I am a man and I am in control. Phew! I stare those eyes back with a tense forehead and wavering eyebrows; a firm resolve within to find answer to all the whys’. Those eyes retaliated me not with firmness but with an enlightened charm. Slowly revealing them; telling me that they are not someone’s eyes. Those eyes that scare me, dread me and leer me- are mine eyes. They are the thoughts within. Those ignored thoughts and aspirations. That voice long suppressed, smirking me, staring me; that voice laughing at the dreams that never materialized; scorning at my yet-another-day; enlightening me to the truth; with an audacity to move ahead; to thrust forward, with choice and charm.

Strip!!!!

This is yet another attempt to draw a better comic strip; i would suggest you guys to please view this pic by saving it in your system- as it would give a fuller view of the strip.

Blocked

Words don’t seek me anymore. Juggling with my intent, I am craving to make some sense. Ideas have receded behind each other, continuing their aloofness from me.
I wish to fill this white sheet with something revolting; something novel. But failure is pounding upon me again and again. I am not helpless- rather there is lessness in my conviction; my intent to seek a new idea; those countless moments where I could have pondered, left fulfilling by either a company or a pleasure.
But once that idea comes, how would it ensure another one trailing; because this stream has to continue, despite settings and mood.
Facing this page is adventure in itself: slowly I am filling this immaculate white with curves and concoctions, hoping, as always, to unveil another aspect of mine. There is a dread. A scare: sense of going wrong, going wry of what had been wished. But I have to practice it. I have to practice facing this sheet again and again. I have to practice to paint it with my words- again and again. It would fail me, thousand times, but there would be, ought to be, that one single moment where I will release some humor, some inspiration and some sense.

Somewhere down within, I know that we were never ‘us’; somewhere out and outside, I found her poly-tonic urbanity too harsh on my mute rusticity; somewhere there in reality, I couldn’t be myself, yet again; and somewhere within this heart, there is an abyss wide open. But somehow things will move on. They always had; they always will.

Just Like That

Cheers!!!!!

Conversations with Sun

Me-Hi Sun, how are you?
Sun-Good.
Me-Hmnn..so how are things going on these days?
Sun-Fine.
Me-Okay..aa..Sun, few days back I had send you a mail regarding you and earth…did u read it?
Sun-No..i don’t check my Paltry-mails folder..
Me-Oh ok..Sun..you do not seem to be in a good mood right now..i think I should get back to you later…
Sun-No..you say whatever you wanted to..
Me-Sun its actually about you only..
Sun-Me..what..is it about my temperament?
Me-Yeah ..somewhat..i mean you know these days you have got so much hot..and you also know how tough it gets for us – the humans – to bear you…so if possible could you pls calm down a bit..i mean it would be a win-win situation..
Sun-No chetan, I am sorry.
Me-But sun pls..evrybody cant afford air conditioned rooms and cars..and there are thousands of people who are dying because of your temperament,,and m..
Sun-Do you have an air conditioned car and room?
Me-No..but that’s n..
Sun- okay..got it..
Sun-Why don’t you buy one?
Me-I cant afford right now..
Sun- So why don’t you talk to my colleague – goddess lakshmi?
Me-Yeah I did.. but she said that I already have enough..so may be..lets see…I am waiting for the next appraisal cycle..
Sun-aa..see as far as what I know is that she’s not well these days..she hurt her back few months back and she’s stooped..and she’s having some personal problems as well…i don’t think she would able to make any considerable change in the coming appraisals..
Me-yeah I know that..she’s been on voice mail for too long now..but sun that’s not the point..i mean its not just about me..it about us- the people on earth…u know u r getting unbearable now..especially to those who have to face ur scorching heat in the afternoons..
Sun-see chetan I don’t like hurting you guys ..but I am helpless mate..you know these moon and venus..they like me being hot..they say that I look extremely sexy in this aggressive..know-all mode..they don’t want me to get calm and cool..
Me-but sun just for these moon and venus..you will incinerate the whole earth?
Sun-No they are not just..moon is my finacee and venus has always been a very good friend of mine..
Me-But still they wont leave you..they will still love you..i mean true love is not about outside..its about inside..
Sun-O shut up chetan..u know these chicks’ these days..they dnt just want that so called “interior-exterior” stuff..they want a man..who shines like beacon above the restl..and is it my fault if I m born with that charm and charisma..moreover I don’t want to loose these girls to Saturn and Jupiter..i hate those guys..
Me-Why so? I mean eventually venus has to go and marry one of them..
Sun-Naa..she says she will remain single for rest of her life..
Me-Aah..thats gr8 ..so out of two just one is left now – the moon..you can manage her…convince her....whatever..pls
Sun-Why one? I mean ..u know moon.. she’s really very moody..i have to inveigle her a lot..and most of the times she remains aloof to pursue her passive hobbies like reading and writing..;; and its in thoset moments when I hang around with venus..i mean she’s a gr 8 cook..and she makes some really good stuff for me ..
Me-But that’s selfish sun..just to keep her as company ..u wont let her mingle with other men..
Sun-Yeah why should i..u know I am sun..i am charm..and I am powerfull..i know I have this know-all kind of attitude..but that’s me..i don’t aspire to be a contemplating quixotic Neptune..nor I wish to be a convivial..lets-have-some-beer kind of Jupiter…and worst one is that I don’t want be that dark materialistic …brooding Saturn….i mean I don’t wish to be like these guys..
Me-But sun..if they have some negative traits ..then they have some positive too..just like you..its just that one has to, just like anyone, mitigate the negative one and try to increment the positive ones..
Sun-Oooo..pls pls don’t get into ur boring philosophical mode..pls..i know what I want to do..and let me do that..pls..if u have any grudges ,,then get me an approval mail from moon, put shiva in cc..if these guys approve then I m ready ..is that fine with you?
Me-Hmnn..i don’t know..i don’t think its easy to deal with moon..she’s too aloof to discuss anything..and her decisions are generally peremptory..and unconvincing..
Sun-That’s ur problem mate..i cant help it..
Me-Sun..can I ask one thing? I mean you are huge..u claim to be father of this solar system..then why are u so scared of moon? I mean if she says anything then just whip her ass..and see how she shall be cowed to silence?
Sun-Ha ha ha ha..no kid no..when I was of ur age..i too had these impish ideas in my mind..but u know what..once u will grow mature u will realize how u could only win a women by patience...u cant just impose urself on her..these women are full of emotions..and they respond only if you connect with them ..just wipe these ideas from ur mind..and u know what..once me and moon went for a dinner..and she was wearing this very revealing dress ..i mean her cleavge was pretty prominently visible..and
Me-Haaaaaaaaaaye…
Sun-What the fuck..how dare u .bc..next time if I saw such expressions on ur face while I am discussing moon..then I will send u to csc Chennai and u keep on savouring bland idli’s for rest of ur life…
Me-No no I m sorry..pls..sun I m sorry..plss..i didn’t mean that..pls
Sun-Get lost mate..just get lost..i thot u wud have improved..but…no..i was wrong…just get lost..
Me-Pls sun..pls..and for god sake,,take a few breaths..u are getting all red once again..pls sun..sun..u there..sun…oh ho..